Friday, April 8, 2011

Why Are Men So Damn Happy?

So I get this email from my cousin today and I'm thinking, yeah, it makes absolute sense. Wonder if it makes sense to my viewers. Will most women agree? Will most men disagree? Of course, we women know we're flawless :D


Why men are generally happy!!


What do you expect from such simple creatures?

Our last name stays put.
The garage is all ours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President.
You can never be pregnant. 
(I'd venture to say if men had to give birth, the population of mankind would dwindle)
You wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay. 
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental $100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.  
One mood all the time.
(Hell, I have no concept of what that would be like. I go through at least three an hour) 
  Phone conversations over in 30 seconds.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. 
(Yeah, women are usually in the state of shock when you guys are thoughtful)
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.  
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Two pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. 
(OMG! I know someone just like this)
The same hairstyle lasts for years until it thins out.
You only have to shave your face and neck.  
You can play with toys all your life.
(It's been said, men grow older, they don't necessarily mature)  
One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.  
 (Only if you're unattached :D)
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
 
   
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
A married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing! 



3 comments:

Hart said...

This is the feed back I got from avilo, who refused to put it in comments - so I'm doing a c&p of our conversation. lol

avilo: -_-
women aren't flawless
the thought of thinking oneself flawless is a flaw in itself
i'm a philosopher

c hart: save it for the comments section

avilo: omg lmao i love your smartassness

avilo: hey women can wear white tshirts to a water park :D

c hart: exactly - you perfect
oops
pervert*

avilo: i am perfect. ty miss freudian ROFLMAO

c hart: stfu

avilo: from the mouth of c hart
"you perfect"i will frame it on my window sill

avilo: one mood all the time?
@_@?
prob true lol

avilo: i like extra credit for slightest acts of thoughtfulness

avilo: and nods i don't see wrinkles in clothes anywhere
must have a 6th sense or something

c hart: the only reason you wore leather jacket in NASL video was because leather doesn't wrinkle

avilo: LOL
no i wore it cause i'm badass

c hart: Hey,you can't check disagree, it's the truth *glares

avilo: omg lol

avilo: i almost checked another option :D

Deb said...

Well the only thing missing from the facts about men is simply this... Men are like toilets... theyre either engaged or full of shit! Fact! lol

Hart said...

LOL...sis, I can always depend on you to put things in the right perspective, especially when you're mad at one.

All men? Or just Twaticus Testosterone at the moment?

Good grief, I'm still laughing.